Three years ago this weekend, we were in Glasgow for the birth of our grandson, a second child for Martin and Ciorsdaidh, our son and daughter-in-law, and a brother for three year old Ciara. Some of our readers will remember our blogs of celebration mixed with anxiety. We knew Dominic was going to have Down Syndrome but we were unprepared for the challenging early days of his life. In the first week, he underwent a critical operation on his kidneys. Those days were dark and full of anxiety as we stayed on in Glasgow, wondering whether Dominic would survive or Ciara would lose the new baby brother whose champion she quickly became.
Most days we would plough our way through the downtown Glasgow traffic to visit the hospital on the opposite side of the city, through the dark tunnel under the river Clyde and out to the enormous hospital where our stress was often increased by the difficulty of finding a parking space. But there was part of the journey which brought a few bright moments. Driving along the Switchback Road up and down through Bearsden – a dual carriageway where daffodils lined the central reservation - brought sustained flashes of gold into those dark days.
The journey for Dominic and his immediate family and extended family has continued to be a switchback road. In the three years since he was born, he has had five operations including successful open-heart surgery at four months and countless visits to the hospital for small procedures or dealing with infections. Until June 2024, he needed to be on additional oxygen to support his breathing, constantly linked to an oxygen cylinder which his parents had to transport everywhere he went. Even now, his reduced kidney function means that he doesn’t get hungry and he has to be fed through a gastrotube straight into his stomach.
Just like the daffodils on the switchback road, Dominic’s presence has brought light and hope and pure fun into our lives. Like all our grandchildren, he has filled our hearts with indescribable joy. This little boy makes friends everywhere he goes with his smile, his gestures, his sounds and his infectious chuckle. His development milestones whether big or small, are more significant because they’re so hard won. Each one is cause for celebration. As his mother, Ciorsdaidh says, ‘He has taught us to be more aware and present with the joys we do have and that every moment is precious.’
Both Dominic’s parents’ resilience, strength and courage in the face of the relentless pressure that his needs and care demands has been bordering on heroic. (Neither of them would want to claim heroism and they have both been at the ends of their tethers sometimes individually and jointly.) But to us and others who observe them, their coping with the endless broken nights, the sudden turns of event in his health, and their flexibility in handling their professional and family lives is inspiring. Dominic’s not walking yet so the sheer physical strength to carry him around and the imagination they both exercise in understanding his very special ways of communicating and meeting all his needs has put pressure on them beyond the understanding of anyone who witnesses it. Whether or not they like the term, they and other parents caring for a special child with special needs, are quietly heroic throughout the daily physical, mental and spiritual challenges of their roles.
As we celebrate Dominic’s third birthday today, we are filled with gratitude for the human daffodils on the switchback of the last three years: medical professionals who have supported the family, everyone who has shown us care. We celebrate Dominic and all the amazing individuals who make the world a brighter and more beautiful place.
On this World Down Syndrome weekend, Happy third birthday, Dominic.
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